To get “heart” we have to give it.

Ok, ok, ok, I know it sounds a little hokey,

and more than just a little like a corny 70’s song from England Dan & John Ford Coley,

“Shine on us allllll let us seeeee, love is the aaanswerr… ohhhh let it shine”

but hear me out for a little Valentine’s Day message and some important food for thought…

If there is a secret to getting your horse to give her heart to you, this is it… Give yours…

To get heart, we have to give it.

What if everything, all the techniques, and horsemanship philosophy just came down to this one basic line…

Love is the answer.

(Probably the answer for everything but let’s specifically talk about training and working with your horse.)

This is universal truth, I don’t think you can argue this, regardless of your religion or spiritual beliefs. I am not preaching up in here. So don’t tune out when I pull out a quote from the good book. Let’s break it down.

The bible defines love as the following…

Love is patient,

love is kind

love does not dishonor others,

it is not easily angered,

it keeps no record of wrongs…

It always protects,

always trusts,

always hopes,

always perseveres.

The verse says ALWAYS, not sometimes, or when I feel like doing it. (when you really think about it, none of this is too easy to be perfect at on a daily basis)

Yeah, yeah you say but “what does this have to do with my horse?”

Well, a lot.

It is the definition of the perfect relationship…

Wouldn’t it be great to be able to say,

“My horse is patient and kind, he never disrespects me, or is quick to get mad at me, and forgets about the stupid mistakes I made yesterday when riding, he always protects, trusts, never gives up hope in me and always perseveres.”


“I am patient and kind, I never dishonor my horse by force or unfair treatment, I am not quick to get mad, I forget things that have happened in the past and let it go… I always protect my horse from mental, physical or from her spirit being broken, I always trust her to do her best never give up hope and always persevere day in and day out.”

In the journey to have purpose and meaning in my life I must follow these guidelines. Sure, I don’t have to if I don’t want to.

God, nor anyone else is not forcing me, but I know, to feel fulfillment, happiness and meaning that is what I must strive to do (man, do I ever fall short, but like Paul I press on).

It’s the same with a horse.

We can’t force him or her to be a partner or to love and respect us.

We can only strive to inspire them to want to be.

The other side of this, is what love with your horse is not.

Perfect love does not mean you are a push over. It is not just spoiling them with affections, but holding them also to the standard we are holding ourselves to. The horse has to follow the same principles we do. It is just our task to teach them the guidelines. To be patient, kind, respectful, not quick to anger…

One more thing for you to treat with love. YOU!

The big book also tells us to “love our neighbors, as we love ourselves”. So, that includes drawing boundaries, asking for respect and keeping yourself safe.

Let’s all put more intentional “love” in our rides today and win our horse’s heart as we give ours.

Happy Valentines Day!! Love you with all my heart, Jenny HorseGirl.me dream & ride fearlessly

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I’m Jen.

Most days you will find me with a coffee in one hand, hot pink manure pick in the other with my mind bubbling over dreaming up ways to help my horse girl sisters find their true selves & ride their best life every. single. day.


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