Just as horses can show us a variety of emotions in one session with them, we too can change our emotions and how we feel. Just as horses can change how they feel and shift their emotions through that one work session, in such a short period of time……we too can shift and change our emotions and how we feel in a short period of time.
In my last Tip, we talked about the Emotional Guidance Scale. Before moving on with our Tip 4 you need to be comfortable at finding your SET POINT. This is a great exercise to use over and over throughout your day. I even made a shrunk version that I laminated and put into my wallet. That way it is with me at all times, and I can refer to it at different points.
Make sure you are still honest and honor yourself at where you’re at and what you are feeling. Honor our emotions as guidance to what you are feeling.
Emotional Guidance Scale:
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
After looking at the scale and finding the SET POINT of where you are at in this moment it might be hard to feel numbers 16 – 21. However it is okay to be feeling whatever emotion it is that you are feeling as you are honest to what you feel. I do not want you to stay in the uncomfortable feeling. That is why it is uncomfortable to push us forwards towards a relief in feeling.
The thing that matters most is that you consciously reach for a feeling that is improved. The word for the feeling is not important.
– Ester Hicks
The goal to shift hoanger collage1w you feel is to think a better thought, feel a relief when you think it. That moves you up the scale to another emotion. So the goal is to not stay in the same feeling but to move to a better feel. Now understand you can not jump straight from 17.Anger to 1.Joy that is a big leap. You can only gain about 5 spots as you move up. So you could go from anger, to discouragement, Blame, worry, doubt to disappointment. Then you have raised your feeling and emotion to a reachable space. You feel better than when you began and have gained some relief.
Why is knowing where you are and moving consciously through feeling your emotions so crucial? The idea is that once you are aware of where you are, how you feel and you know how to consciously move to a better feeling emotion then you never have to be “stuck” in a feeling ever again. You don’t have to stay in an emotion that doesn’t feel good for you. YEAH! Make a change to feel better.
Make the commitment to yourself that no matter how good or bad the feelings are that you, you will make the best of it. You are just reaching for the best feeling emotion/thought that you can right now at this moment to get just a little bit of relief. This means imagining what the next step for you to take that makes sense it as well. It can be what step you imagine that helps you reach forward to your goal.
When you identify what action or thought is making feel the feeling then that is where you start. For example you might say, I want more money. The thought of that statement, I want more money, takes you to the emotion you are feeling about wanting more money. So wanting more money is not really about going from I have no money, to I have money. It is the emotional state and how you feel that has to shift to get to bringing in more money. What does that mean? It means you say I have no money and change that to a positive that feels better of I have more money or I want more money. What are you really feeling and emotionally thinking? That is what has to change.
Find the thought that is bringing you the emotion you are feel. Get very clear and pinpoint your SET POINT on the scale. The stronger the negative feeling, the harder or slower you move through the scale. The less the faster you will go through the scale.
The situation is you walk into the break room at work and your diet coke is gone….again! You know it is Wanda the girl who works next to you. She has done this before.
I want to walk over there and go off on her. (19 rage)
I should put another diet coke in there and shake it for an hour first. (18 revenge)
It makes me so angry when she takes my drink. (17 anger)
Maybe I just can’t bring my own drinks. (16 discouragement)
It is all Wanda’s fault. (15 blame)
What if I can’t have any drink with my lunch? (14 worry)
Wanda will never leave my drink alone. (13 doubt)
I just can’t believe she would take my drink. (12 disappointment)
So that is an example of going from #19 rage and working up the scale to move to #12 disappointment. That is a relief in feeling from rage to disappointment.
This can become a fun and exciting exercise since you are now aware that you can consciously make a choice on how you feel. You can change how you look at a situation to shift aspects and relationships in your life.
References: As adapted from ‘Ask and It Is Given’ by: Ester and Jerry Hicks and the teachings of Abraham.